Life has a way to turn things around for us.

This month of May has been full of events and making important decisions that, I can say, are life-changing for me. For starters, the Philippine National Elections Day challenged me to stand for what I believe in and reminded me of my role and purpose as a citizen. Imagine how a single vote for one day can turn the lives of people around and seem to have a glimpse of a predetermined future. It brought an impact on me, especially spiritually. Allow me to share some of my personal thoughts and revelations about it.

• A call for repentance, humility, and obedience. [Read James 4:1-7]
• A call for Christians to be discerning and bold to stand firm by the standards of God.
• A call to start NOW in exercising one’s faith in Christ and preaching the Gospel.
• A call to co-labor for the advancement of God’s Kingdom.
• A call to tell my story. To share my testimony.
• A call to persevere in tests and trials. [Read James 1:2-4]

I happened to organize our company team building and summer outing, which I really love and missed doing for such a long time. Since the lockdowns, it has been impossible to put so many people together in one room. Finally, we were able to go out and have a change of scenery for once. After two years, this was the first that I was able to host and spend a summer outing with my colleagues at the beach. I had so much fun. It is one of my treasured moments.

I also started my transition period this month for a career shift that I have been looking forward to. This is scary, exciting, and going to be a lot of different emotional roller coasters. But I am happy and hopeful it will turn out great in the future. It is like watching your dreams unfold in reality.

If there is one moment that drastically impacted me this month, by having me choose between standing up for myself and what I deserve or continuing to fight a losing battle. Honestly, it took a lot of courage, prayer, and obedience for me to make a sound decision. It led me to remember who I am and not lose myself in the circumstances, people, or relationships. So I chose to give up the fight of a losing battle and gave all my energy and focus instead to be better in living out my purpose and the bright future ahead of me.

I gave myself a little something to hold on to and remember.

Not to be cliche, but my tattoos do have meanings for me. And this one is just a simple reminder that I will never forget who I am and what made me who I am now, to love and embrace all my versions to grow and be transformed.

But what brought me to this write-up today is because of a song, specifically a line from a song my friend shared. She thought I could relate to it with my current situation. If you heard of All I Want by Olivia Rodrigo, the chorus goes like this,

All I want is love that lasts
Is all I want too much to ask?
Is it something wrong with me?
All I want is a good guy
Are my expectations far too high?
Try my best, but what can I say
All I have is myself at the end of the day
And All I want is for it to be okay

It is a great song, and I have nothing against it. However, I disagree with my friend (HAHA, sorry girl) because I cannot relate to it. Especially along the lines, All I want is love that lasts… All I want is a good guy… Although I must say, the only part I could relate to with that song is the line, All I have is myself at the end of the day. So here are my two cents.

I do not want a love that lasts.

I am already contented and overflowing, beyond my comprehension, by the love poured to me by my First Love. I desire nothing else but Him and His everlasting love for me. No one else can give that.

I want a love that fights.
A love that pursues and perseveres.
The kind of love that believes in its power and Giver.

All I want – all I ever want my whole life, is to experience the kind of love that will pursue me and fights for me, a love that understands my highest of highs and my lowest of lows. A love that evolves and sees through me.

Only then do I believe that that kind of love will last in a relationship when it stands still through the test of time. I deserve nothing less, for I have been fought for, died for, and consumed by the love of my Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus Christ.

Even if no one will do those things for me at the end of the day, and all I have is myself, I am okay. I am not really on my own when my Heavenly Father who loves me dearly is with me.